When the Dalai Lama said that if every 8 year-old in the world learned to meditate, we would have world peace in a generation, he was scientifically correct.
I did some research for a recent speaking engagement about mindfulness at work and it turns out that the catch in your throat as you are about to ask for a raise, meet someone new or experience a surprise encounter has a neurological component that can be healed through the practice of daily meditation. Of course there’s more to it than this simple practice, but without this practice, you are operating with the smart half of your brain tied to the crazy part, in a three-legged sack race to the hellish, hardest way of healing.
We are born with brains that are wired for survival, meaning that our fear centers and our pain centers are directly and swiftly connected to our prefrontal cortex, where our logical, thinking parts reside. Biologically, this is smart, as you want to react quickly to impending danger and freeze up or run like hell IF you are a caveman, rather than a 20th century air-conditioned and heated office and home dweller.
This is why, if you are standing in a room with people whispering in a corner, you automatically assume it’s about you (and I automatically assume it’s about me). Those whispers might mean a plot against you-not hearing something clearly is dangerous for a caveman, and your brain wants you to feel unsafe and react. It’s also a large part of the reason that we group people together and label them- pattern recognition keeps us safe in the face of danger. Neurochemically speaking, prejudice and profiling feel just like a sensible “better safe than sorry” reaction.
Our brain’s go-to neural pathways cause us to react to pain with fear and obsessive thought. When we feel pain, we are triggered to worry about it and focus on it until it goes away. This is a big part of the reason why our surgeon general recently issued a desperate plea to doctors for help with our massive epidemic of opioid abuse.
This fast-moving loop between fear, thought, pain and survival is why you feel self-conscious at the beach in a bathing suit, and hesitate to tell the truth about your life. It’s the main reason that you feel nervous around people who look “off” or different. It’s the epicenter of the shame hurricane since shame is a sure way to stop you from risking your life with full self-expression. (remember, your brain does not know the difference between stepping off a cliff and taking a bold step towards your dreams.)
When you practice daily, sitting meditation, the connection between your fear center, your pain center and your thinking center breaks down so that gossip, pain, a new financial challenge, or your dreams don’t automatically trigger your fear and survival center. At the same time, the centers of logic and empathy, your prefrontal cortex and your hippocampus, become connected with new neurochemical pathways, resulting in a healthy self and other awareness and understanding, rather than a frozen crazy story about you or them from the ancient past. (The file drawers containing every mistake you ever made and every bad thing that can happen, can be closed and only opened when you need them.)
Steady practice changes your brain and makes you less likely to be afraid or repulsed by people that are totally different from you and more likely to engage in thought about WHY they act the way they do and the ways in which they are similar to you. This is why I am saying that meditation actually is the path to world peace.
Over time, you can let strong feelings like anxiety come and go and you can handle pain better, since that neurochemical pathway is changed as well. (In brain scans, the pain center in the brain is MUCH smaller in people who regularly practice meditation and, unlike drugs, meditation actually decouples your pain center from your self-awareness center, allowing you to detach from your pain ) Some studies have found that meditation is more effective than morphine at decreasing the sensation of pain.
Meditators feel the same feelings- sometimes even more intensely as a result of their enhanced self-awareness, but they aren’t bothered by them at the same level. Meditators who meditate for years actually experience a positive permanent change in their brain; over time their prefrontal cortex shrinks back down to normal but they still experience enhanced self-esteem, calmness and empathy. They can choose the amount of attention they want to give to their thoughts at any time. This predictable result of daily meditation practice is a life-enhancing skill that literally changes the game for a human being.
Of course, there is more to healing our world and us than just regular meditation, but I think it’s a good FIRST step, rather than an add-on after being so stressed we have no choice. Walking around with a fear-thought pain-thought-survival loop in our brains makes it much harder to understand each other; Many experts estimate that we spend more than half of our waking lives worrying and thinking about stuff that doesn’t matter rather than being present.
Meditation practice actually changes this ratio-not through some unattainable spiritual path ( although as you know I am a BIG fan of faith and prayer – which also has a massive positive impact on your brain) but through SCIENCE.
The Buddha, Jesus, God and all the other spiritual giants were exactly right- you can transform your life with the steady practice of silent and guided meditations. (I just finished a religion research project and pretty much everybody says to meditate regularly, but most faithful people skip this step.)
I find it helpful to think of it this way – my brain needs meditation like my body needs water,– that’s how critical this practice is to optimal brain health and function.
It’s not always easy to start, but once a couple weeks pass, the positive changes help keep the practice going; it only takes a few days for positive results to start.
There are several apps and groups that support meditation practice. A big side benefit of practicing is meeting other practitioners-people who are investing time and effort in the pursuit of serenity and mindfulness.
When we sing together, our hearts start to beat in unison. We really are connected and my favorite monk was right when he said
“You can help with world peace by achieving inner peace-you are too small to do anything about the whole world, but with practice you can change your whole world and then their whole world.”- Venerable Bhante Sujatha
I like to think of practice as a way to thaw out, untie and let go of the frozen knot in my part of the human connection rope; As I unwrap myself from nonstop thinking and fear based reactions, I can be here, with you, with less barrier between us.
Good luck on your personal journey from here to there. I hope you can feel my love, support and gratitude for every effort made toward inner peace as I believe this is the only path to outer peace.
(well, that and outlaw profits on drugs and war weapons-sorry I had to say it!)
thank you for reading
At a refuge recovery meeting in Chicago last night, I was inspired with the idea that I could use loving kindness to help with my addictive tendencies. As I reached for the usual late night salty snack, I paused.
“May I be happy May I be peaceful, May I be well. ” I repeated this mentally a few times.
Although I didn’t feel better right away, saying this reminded me that I was in a vulnerable state. (will power is non-existent when we are tired.)
- As my own best friend, ( thank you for this, Bikkhuni Vimala), I paused, and asked myself: “Why do you want this?” I didn’t care. I just wanted to stuff my face. (That wasn’t a helpful question for me, but I am writing about it because it might be effective for you.)
- The next question did help me; Who wants these chips?
For some reason, that was easy to see; the lonely, aging girl, who is single and afraid that she will be that way forever, who is terrified that she will end up homeless, and broke. ( I know this future is not realistic, but these thoughts and my feelings are real to me when I think them and feel them- the real reasons that I want to eat, spend or drink too much.)
I understood that I would rather feel bad about eating too much or staying up too late than about being lonely or broke in the future; I can engage in accountability or find a method that helps me to stop eating too much or staying up too late, but loneliness and fear are a big part of being human. All of us have lonely feelings from time to time-even my happily married friends confess this. Most of us experience the feeling of lack, no matter how much money or stuff we have. Some of us feel bad from time to time about the way we look, feel, or speak. Feeling these feelings is rough, but in my pause I felt it all, and it lessened just a tiny bit. (I forgot to take three deep breaths this all happened in at most a couple minutes, but I can see now that breathing consciously would have been helpful as well.)
Finally I asked myself the most important question.
- Can I be kind to the part of myself that wants to stuff her face? Can I reassure the woman who wants withdraw her submissions to literary journals and stop writing her book because she is afraid of exposure? Can I love the me that is afraid to post this – that wants to take out the broke part and the lonely part and the real parts? That doesn’t want you to think that I am some analytical freak?
I was surprised that I could reassure myself – love was available when will power had dissolved and I think this is because I practice meditation frequently, and I have been graced with skilled, generous teachers and noble friends.
I remember Venerable Bhante Sujatha beaming with joy even more than usual one day – when I asked him why-he said
“I am getting better and better at loving kindness! It is so wonderful!”
I didn’t really understand why that would be such a big deal, but now I see; loving-kindness and compassion are skills that improve with practice over time. Love is a powerful, effective force for positive change and internal happiness, but it requires steady practice to be accessible when we need it the most.
I still ate some salty snack, but not as much as I usually do in my compulsive way when I am tired. (I actually enjoyed the food, instead of using the food to numb me. For me, this was a big victory at the end of a long day.)
It was as if a dear friend had reached out and gently pushed my hand away , saying to me, “Are you sure this is what you need? Can I try telling you that all is well first, then see if you still want to engage in a habit that doesn’t feel good the next day?” I felt loved and understood by this friend in a way that is hard to describe.
That “dear friend” has a name. She’s called “practice.”
(There is the biological component to most addictions that must be addressed as well but I think it is essential to become more skilled at loving-kindness so that we can be our own best friend and reassure ourselves that we don’t have to keep eating, drinking, drugging or spending too much, and that we are worth the time and effort required for recovery.)
If we want the world to heal, it’s important to remember that we are models for our loved ones and each other. While I might encourage my closest friend or my child to let go and indulge in a treat or a luxury once in a while, I would never consciously encourage stress relief with addictive behavior – but if I am using harmful behavior to relieve my stress, I am unconsciously encouraging that in others.
I am committed to be the living proof that love is all we need, and that kindness is more powerful than even the biggest, meanest force in the universe.
May you be well, may you be happy, and may you be peaceful. Be kind to you, so you can keep being you.
Thank you for reading this rather long-winded post about a moment in time!
I love you
“What makes the desert beautiful,’ said the little prince, ‘is that somewhere it hides a well…”
― Antoine de Saint-Exupéry, The Little Prince
Scientists were surprised when they found the tangled yuck of Alzheimer’s and dementia in the autopsied brains of people who had never lost functionality. These people had some memory loss and confusion, but nothing that prevented the deceased from living a full and happy life. What was the difference? In one group of nuns, the difference was language dexterity. The nuns who had learned to speak fluently in a different language were more functional than those without this background.
People who learn instruments or new languages, engage in a vigorous course of study and teaching, or other new, challenging activities as they age, might ward off the symptoms of dementia and Alzheimer’s, even though their brains are afflicted by these diseases. The way this works is complex but we can work with the science in some very simple ways. Omega 3 fatty acids ( fish oil, flax seed), memorization ( grows your hippocampi, preventing the tangles caused by these diseases), and meditation ( literally grows the essential gray matter in your brain and musical practice ( one of the best exercises for your brain, using both halves and engaging you in the most productive, beneficial way possible-it’s like planks for your brain!)
I though about this on my hike yesterday, when I was walking backwards, down a hill. I walk downhill this way for four reasons:
- It’s really good for my calves
it protects my knees and
It helps with balance ( when I trip or stumble is regular life, I don’t fall) and mostly,
It’s a proven confidence builder
Although the studies don’t mention this, I am pretty sure that confidence is a major factor in brain health and functionality as we age. We need confidence to learn a new language, make the mistakes necessary to learn or practice a musical instrument, or to speak up when we need something or we can’t hear. It’s hard to push the button near your hospital bed to get your pillow adjusted just right or get a ride to the corner store if you feel bad asking for help!
I dated a man in a wheelchair who was very happy and I really think his main strength was confidence-he asked for help when he needed it and did not feel obligated to return every single favor. I want to be more like him as I age. I want to get better at managing impatience, criticism and other reactions to my requests in others, since I might have to ask someone to repeat something 3 times before I understand it! So, for me and for you, here are some good ways to add confidence building into your life, before you need it!
- Look up, way up, as you walk, up through the trees even, just for a moment– it’s not as easy as it sounds.
- Close your eyes on a safe pathway and MOVE-reassure yourself and your brain that you don’t need to see every micro thing in front of you to take a step
- Walk frequently in nature, and walk backwards at least part of the way- the neurochemical impact of trees, bird sounds and vastness are not replaceable by any other means, and making your way through the “wilds” even on a pre-made path, is another way to build confidence
- Meditate-it literally increases the gray matter in your brain, and naturally instills confidence and self-reassurance over time
- Learn a musical instrument-this is like planks for your brain-there is no-good substitute and learning a new skill is a great confidence builder
- Create something – writing, painting, sewing, photography, and encourage someone with more talent to give you feedback. Practice responding to criticism and improving your performance. Get better at managing impatience in yourself and other people.
- Memorize- the dictionary, some facts, poetry, each and every day. Make a goal to recite “the Raven” by Edgar Allen Poe or some other long prose. We want our hippocampi in fighting form as our brains get attacked by all the environmental and internal threats as we age!
- and, this is not a confidence builder directly, but Eat WELL – 3 cups of leafy greens, 3 cups of colorful veggies and fruit, 3 cups of cruciferous veggies every day and lots of omega three fatty acids- I know this sounds impossible, but 3 cups of spinach sautees down to an easy snack, and smoothies are a great way to get in kale,etc.- supplements are NOT the same, althought they are better than ignoring nutrition. (You can start small but just remember your mitochondria are starving for this nutrition and they will strike and quit if you don’t address their demands which means you won’t be able to move or think very well!)
There are many different ways to build confidence, BEFORE you succeed at your next challenge. Just remember, it is not going to be easy to develop if we don’t keep learning and growing. Our priceless wisdom, mostly available when we are OLD,(imagine how much life a 90 year old has seen!) benefits no one if we don’t have the confidence to ask someone to speak up or move closer.
Good luck to all of us as we grow into our respective ages. I am embracing old ladyhood with all my heart, and my habits; Hopefully, confidence will be my trusted ally to help me get the help I need!
Thank you for reading; I am confident, as always, that you are fabulous, so please, keep being YOU
And now this, from Ikkyu, an ancient Zen priest:
( he is described as “rascally”)
I’d love to give you something
but, what would help?
Self other right wrong
wasting your life arguing
you’re happy, really
you are happy.
( The symbol at the top of this post represents the chinese characters for poetry: Word Temple; I found this poem and this symbol on an excellent blog post about poetry)
The Maddest Dog of All
I’ve been assigned to do a research project about Islam. (and Christianity and Judaism and all ism’s and ams everywhere and yes I am including you too, Buddhism, Hinduism, and atheism!)
I am sick and tired of people using words like sacred, faith, or belief as a shield for oppression and violence. Until I hear people in mosques and pulpits and temples actively denouncing and discarding the idea that it is a sin to engage in sexual relations with people of the same sex ( or a bare minimum let go of the notion that those people will burn in eternal hell fire for being who they are), and that it is not ok to stay mute about issues that affect millions of people, I believe that we are getting nowhere.
And don’t start with me about the nonsense that it is ok to be gay, but it’s not ok to have gay sex! It’s the same damn thing!!! This logic is a discriminatory SNARL from a rabid dog who paces over the grates of oppression hell, growling and snapping at the hands of anyone who dares to reach up and out. Even the tiny hands of children are stomped back down when they try to be heard!
I think assault weapons should be banned for the greater good. I also think a paragraph in an instructional text from GOD that says that our trans, bi, gay or questioning brothers and sisters are going to hell unless they stop acting like who they are should be banned too-Stop treating these mad words as sacred!
Mental illness + poverty+ a lack of education + treating evil ideas as sacred words from the Almighty ruler of the universe is a recipe for the guaranteed propagation of terrorism, murder and oppression. (I guess it is ok to believe that YOU will burn in eternal hell for whatever reasons YOU choose to imagine, but it is NOT ok to teach people around the world that THEY will burn in hell for being them!)
Stop, breathe, and think. These words are outright dangerous in the hands of a non-critical or desperate or even an indecisive person. And trust me, every ism has them-(yes even yours!)
No one should have to “interpret” a commandment to kill a human who does not believe like them. No one should read that God says that women are chattel or that it is a good idea to beat children into submission or that gay sex is evil! Animal cruelty should not have a biblical safe haven. No time period or reason or context exists that makes any of this remotely acceptable.
I think it’s time for faithful people to take a stand.
Edit the books. Sit down with a big red marker and cross this flipping nuttiness OUT.
I’m sorry. I love my faithful friends. I pray in Holy Name Cathedral almost every day on my way to work. I have a special place in my heart for the beautiful practices of the Muslim people. I have been blessed with hearing and participating in the call to prayer in Abu Dhabi and here at home. I practice Buddhist precepts. I am a BIG proponent and an avid practitioner of many faith habits, but for goodness sakes, let’s add a disclaimer or discard the bad parts altogether – once and for all just do it! No religion is exempt! None is better or worse- we all have this problem!
And yes, of course you can argue about this, but please, first look at your own faith literature -subtle silences can be just as damaging when it comes to accepting discriminatory and violent practices. Read the Buddhist philosophy about sex or the rights of women;trust me, you will notice a rather serious missing.
In other religions, people are taught that being gay is a sin. This is a violent, oppressive ideal that is written down or insinuated in most sacred books and studied all over the world. (Also, the “eternal Treblinka” described by Einstein and continually suffered by other species originates from the idea in these books that we are somehow superior to all other beings.)
Stop talking to me about ‘radical extremism’ and start saying that these parts of the book that WE follow are WRONG too, and that no loving God or meditative Buddha would ever utter these incendiary words or stay silent about inequality and we do NOT believe this, nor do we think you should believe this!
Anything less is not enough in my not-so-humble opinion.
Root it out. Expose it all. And throw this rotten shit into the landfill of bad mad ideas where it belongs before it can infect anyone else!
( and please don’t talk to me about context or history! These ideas and so many others were NEVER right-never ever ever NEVER in any context during any time period for any reason!)
Thank you for reading. I love each and every one of you, especially if you disagree with me!
Now, gimme that marker!
Whoah, excuse my vertigo!
I am a little dizzy sitting way up here, on top of the shoulders of so many hard working, relentless voices for equal rights!
Regardless of your political views or affiliations, please give yourself the gift of a moment today to reflect on the fact that a woman became a presumptive nominee for president last night, (and that her gender is an untouchable issue so far(at least I haven’t heard any slurs against her for being a woman from her competitors), even in the hate campaign trail!)
Tell your daughters, your sisters, your wives and your mothers that together, we can do it!
ok, are you ready to roll? Let the battles begin!
thank you for reading my post, (and remember that I deeply honor, respect and cherish each and every one of you, no matter who you vote for. In fact I love our differences even more than our similarities.)
Now, I am rolling up my sleeves and getting ready for a grand fight! Let’s rumble!
I declare to you that woman must not depend upon the protection of man, but must be taught to protect herself, and there I take my stand.
Men, their rights, and nothing more; women, their rights, and nothing less.
I distrust those people who know so well what God wants them to do, because I notice it always coincides with their own desires.
This is why I love Muhammad Ali ( and you will too, if you read his autobiography!)
When I get back to the hotel, we rush to pack and get ready for the flight to Atlanta. I’m making phone calls to Philadelphia when C.B. Atkins, one of Herbert’s business aides, and Blue Lewis, my sparring partner, answer a knock at the door.
“Someone here with some packages for The Champ!” Blue yells over his shoulder. “Gift packages!” He comes back with two boxes neatly wrapped in white tissue, tied with red and green ribbons, and tosses one to C.B. Then he reads out loud the lettering on top of his box. “It says, ‘To Cassius Clay from Georgia.’ ” He begins tearing it open.
“Who knew I wanted cake for breakfast? Get the knife.” Suddenly, yelling and cursing, he drops the package. Blood is dripping from his hands. The package is on the floor and the body of a little black chihuahua has rolled out, its head severed from its body.
A message in the box reads: “We know how to handle black draft-dodging dogs in Georgia. Stay out of Atlanta!” A Confederate flag is the only signature. In the other box is a rag doll in yellow boxer shorts and tiny boxing gloves. A rope is tied around its throat and the head is jerked to the side to show its neck is broken. C.B. and Blue run down the hall to catch the messenger, but they come back alone. The little dog’s body is still warm, and we make the box a casket.
But I keep the doll. Without the rope around its neck it will make a good toy for my three-year-old daughter. It’s a well-made doll, a lot of care went into it, and it looks a little like me. Not as pretty, but a good resemblance.”
One of my favorite people is a very successful dentist. When I asked him about the secret to his obvious financial success, he said this:
“Some of my patients struggle to pay dental bills and I just refuse to waste any of the money they earned. Even if it is easy for someone to pay, I know that most of their money was at least initially hard-won. I feel like they are trusting me with their money-it is a gift that I treasure.
I wish I had adopted this attitude from the start.
While it is a privilege and an honor to do what you love for a living, I am learning that it could be just as fulfilling to love the results of what you do.
I have many friends who might not LOVE their day job but they thoroughly enjoy the results of their work, which often include a happy, well-fed family, enjoyable vacations, comfortable environs, and contributions of time and money to causes that matter to them.
Sometimes the happy results are within the work itself; the company is re-branded successfully, you finish your first novel, or you successfully inspire a junior colleague to reach their financial dreams.
I have learned that putting my writing first, (although it did pay off in many ways great and small and I am very happy that I became a full-time writer) did not mean that I had to put my money last.
As our kids graduate and contemplate their career choices, I think it is important to remind them that money does, indeed, matter, and that earning money and using it for good, whether for themselves or others, is a noble and productive use of their time.
I also like to think of money as a near perfect practice tool.
With mindful consideration and meditation about money and its impact on our thought process ( a sampling of flawed ideas about money might include: we will never have enough, we are losers without money or winners with money, we deserve money more than a starving child and his mother, money is a special gift from God set aside for only special people, money measures our worth as humans, money is impossible to manage etc.), we can improve not only our finances, but our relationship with ourselves and others. We can explore our notions about the inherent worth of a human life
“Handling” money is an opportunity to touch generosity, greed, lust, scarcity, poverty, wealth and many other rich human experiences.
If we don’t feel gratitude as we pay our electric bill, or if we have never let someone “off the hook” about money, or if we think that our bank accounts reflect our worth, or if we insist that money doesn’t matter, we are probably missing some critical learning opportunities.
Remember, most people don’t have shoes.
(Enough money is a privilege granted to very few people on this earth.)
I am hopeful that my leaning paths will inspire more than they hurt. ( putting money on the bottom of the list can hurt you and others- that is one more reason to treat it carefully)
Thank you for reading and for today, I am going to celebrate this:
I have my gym shoes on for my walk to work, and high heels in my bag for the time in my beautiful office today- TWO pairs of shoes.
As my mom would say, “hip hip hooray!!!! hip hip hooray!!!!
Today at 3pm, many people will observe a minute of silence amidst the summer fun and home improvement project festivities.
The National Moment of Remembrance Act was passed by Congress in 2000 as a way to honor those who died, and as a result of the desire of many people to see Memorial Day as a sad and profound remembrance of the terrible consequences of war, rather than a celebration of the start of summer.
At 3pm, taps will play, train whistles will blow and people across the country will stop, pray, contemplate or just breathe.
While we thank the veterans, and those who have paid the ultimate price for our freedom, it is helpful to remember that we are not only celebrating traditional heroes today;we are being called on to remember the terrified young men who were conscripted into unwinnable or horrific wars and killed as a result of their unwillingness to break the law or their dutiful adherence to the sacred rules of service.
We can remember the dads, moms, brothers, children, sisters, husbands and wives who volunteered to serve under the pressure of poverty . We can also remember the people who died running away – who failed to be perfect and were killed, maybe feeling like cowards, maybe failing to help or even hurting their brothers and sisters in service. We can remember soldiers to whom no one paid respects-who died alone with no loved ones back home to grieve them, or those who were never identified.
Many people source the start of memorial day as a day in which African-American former slaves decorated the graves of their fallen friends. It was a day to finally recognize their contributions to our country.
At 3pm, let’s imagine what if might have felt like to die on a battlefield or in a truck or a plane or a hospital. Sometimes the label of hero (or coward) can separate us from each other, putting these brave souls up on a pedestal that we can never reach.
This is dangerous to world peace, as a death becomes an honor to celebrate, rather than a heartbreaking tragedy that is due to our world-wide inability to find a better way to solve conflicts. I do not know this better way, some wars do seem necessary, and I am thankful for my hard-won-by-others freedom. I mean no dishonor by this post. I have not lost someone to war, or fought in any of our battles. I just want to remember to say that I am sorry as often as I say “thank you” to the famlies and friends of the men, women and children who have died at war.
One minute of silence.
Imagine what a soldier in the middle of a war zone would give for that.
Thank you for reading, and thank you from the bottom of my heart for your service.
I will be thinking of you at 3pm and always, and praying for peace to finally take its rightful place as the top priority in our world.
My food accountability group ( four of us text each other every single thing we eat along with our exercise accomplishments and our weight) inspires me to learn all I can about the best ways to stay fit and healthy AND the most effective ways to stop the madness of food cravings.
Last night I learned four helpful truths about cravings:
- If you crave salt, you are probably thirsty. Your brain will stimulate a desire for salty food, so that you will drink some some water! Before you grab another handful of popcorn or chips, stop, take one long breath ( this interrupts the primitive craving pathway in your brain and engages the smarter executive functions), step away from the counter or get up off the couch, and drink a full glass of water. Breathe in and out twice more, stretch, and see if you really want that next handful.
- If you crave sugar, you might be tired. If this is the case, before you sink your precious teeth into that enamel destroying donut, stretch and do your best to YAWN. This will flood your brain with oxygen and healing chemicals and enable you to step away from the candy jar. You also crave sugar when you are deficient in chromium and vanadium. Theses minerals are so powerful that they are used to prevent and cure diabetes (high blood sugar) and hypoglycemia (low blood sugar). A craving for chocolate ( and no there is NOTHING wrong with chocolate, but cravings in general, are not an indicator of a healthy desire) is usually a sign of a magnesium deficiency. Methadone and other drugs help addicts through the early stages of withdrawa; I think food addicts would benefit by a prescription for minerals and practices that are scientifically proven to reduce cravings along with therapy, spiritual habits, and environmental changes.
- If you crave carbohydrates, you might be doing your best to ward off depression. And the absolute worst time to indulge yourself in a carbohydrate binge is at nighttime( this is a perverse and terrible trick of nature -I mean what is better than salty popcorn or chips and bad TV at the end of a long day?) If you overeat carbs at night, you’ll spike your blood sugar, preventing the helpful fat burning activity that can occur while you sleep. Instead of another piece of bread, close your eyes and take three long breaths. Feel how you feel. Call a friend, go for a walk ( exercise has been proven in study after study to prevent and stop depression!), or just cry– emotional tears actually shed stress hormones along with the water, AND they stimulate endorphins, which stop depression in its tracks. If you have a dog or a person or just yourself, practice hugging. ( I know this sounds goofy, but you can wrap your hands around your shoulders and hug yourself. It stimulates most of the good stuff caused by hugging another being!) Hugging releases tension and elevates dopamine levels, which might stop you from one more french fry. (If you really need to eat, (after all, food is here to comfort and satisfy us- deprivation almost never works for long) try sautéing some kale or another hearty vegetable in basil, olive oil and salt- this often satisfies my need for a salty snack and doesn’t seem to increase my waist line!
- If you crave fat, your brain probably needs some fatty acids-rather than oily french fries, try some added flax-seed to your oatmeal in the morning, or be sure to use some healthy olive oil in your cooking. If you are not a vegan, fish oil pills and salmon are good choices too.
It is true that cravings are not random, and food addiction is real. So remember to stop, breathe, and think.
Thank you so much for reading my post.